The Painters

By Michael Damianos

Intuition is a funny phenomenon. It allows us to bypass discernment and put the decision-making process in hyperdrive. Film star Ingrid Bergman said,” You must train your intuition - you must trust the small voice inside you that tells you what to say, what to decide.”  This photo exemplifies that quote. The three of us were on horses waiting for a class at the Scottsdale Arabian Show when I instinctively called out to Dawn Damianos to take our picture. I had no reason at the time – my intuition simply kicked in. 

Later I gazed at that photo and thoughts started dancing in my head. I was between two respected horse trainers, both of whom I have known for decades. I reflected on our times together and my respect for them. The three of us, Jeff Lee, myself, and Brett Becker, have traveled a road few take for long. Most travelers exit before they get to the point in their lives that we are in now.  We are lifelong professional horseman. Respectively, we are in our 70’s, 60’s, and 50’s. I first met Jeff in 1992 when we were both judges at the U.S. National Championships in Louisville, Kentucky. That would be one of many major events he would judge in the years to follow. I met Brett for the first time in 1994 at a show in Del Mar, California. Brett was showing a Half-Arabian western horse named The Barrister. That horse proved to be just one of many great western horses he would show. 

Our life journeys have similarities, differences and parallels. We have all experienced exhilarating, successful, and rewarding moments in our occupation. We have also experienced broken bones, broken promises, broken hearts, and broken dreams.  We share recollections of what Arabian horse showing once was, and share with each other visions of where Arabian horse showing is going. This picture is a piece of art that depicts three survivors of a life dedicated to horses. All three of us have our accomplishments, our disappointments, our triumphs, our failures, and countless memories. We don’t mind our scars, aches and regrets because we did not waver on the path we chose. Our choices were ours. We are proud and grateful our lives are horsemens’ tales. 

“This picture is a piece of art that depicts three survivors of a life dedicated to horses.”

 As Erin Van Vuren wrote: “You are worn and cracked and dented.  And that is okay because I’ve never heard of a clean and shiny sword that won a war.”  

The more I stared at the photo the more I considered it art depicting three cowboys. Our eyes gleam with an air of confidence, a result of our past accomplishments. Our smiles indicate a sense of optimism that there are still bright days to come. It is a meaningful depiction of us, but we were only the subject matter. The recognition for great art should go to the artists responsible for the work. This masterpiece required three painters: Melody Lee, Dawn Damianos, and Marjie Becker. They are the ones on the other side of the easel responsible for what is depicted here. Not one of them needed us to be who they are, they just chose to love a cowboy. Melody has won National titles in the extremely competitive Hunter division and coached many successful amateurs.  Dawn Damianos has two masters degrees and is a highly respected school principal. Marjie Becker has won National Championships in all three seats, western, hunter and saddle seat. 

Jeff and Melody met when they both worked for the late Mo Morris. Mo was a well-known trainer in another time and rode some greats including Khemosabi. They have been married for 46 years. Dawn and I met when she bought her first horse from me in the mid 80’s. We have been married 34 years. Brett and Marjie have known each other since they were youth riders.  They reconnected when both of them worked for Arabian trainers in Texas. They have been married 27 years. All three woman raised a husband and children. Their children and their husbands became productive adults. 

“We have also experienced broken bones, broken promises, broken hearts, and broken dreams.”

On the surface this work of art celebrates three noted horsemen who have gone the distance. But when you understand the history behind the painting, it is a tribute to the painters. They have been our rooters, task masters, moral compasses, shotgun riders, confidants, sounding boards, nurses, managers, and inspiration for decades. Many career professional horsemen have more ex-wives than saddles, but not the three of us. Our marriages have withstood the tests and tribulations of a life that most people could never understand. Country Western star, Cody Johnson, has a song called “The Painter.”  Its chorus blazes in my head as I think of what this picture is really about.

“I don’t remember

Life before she came into the picture

Brought the beauty I was missin’ with her

Showed me the colors I ain’t ever seen

She took chances

With every wall I built, she saw a canvas

I thank God every day for how he made her

My life was black and white, but she’s the painter”

What does it take to survive and thrive as horse trainer? The answer is clear. It takes a tenacious, intelligent, diligent, industrious, patient, creative, tolerant, loving partner to really get somewhere.  Because of them when we look in the rear view mirror, life has flown by at warp speed.  American Opera tenor Robert Breault wrote, “Sometimes the shortest distance between two points is a winding path walked arm and arm.”  Ladies, thank you for taking that winding and often bumpy path with us. You have our profound gratitude and humble apologies for being our painters.